14 April 2016

Let's Talk About... Health and Employment (7) - Break Time




Update - Week 9

Whoa!  What - already?  What happened to the other ones??

Yes, I know it's been a couple of weeks since the last one, but I didn't think there was that much to say, really.  Or maybe I wasn't quite correct with that.  

Hmmm... Let's see...

I hope you all had a great Easter, and while enjoying the choccy that generally comes with it, spared a thought or more for the real reason we celebrate it.

Every Easter, our church combines with our sister churches in Hamilton to hold a convention over two days, that everyone is welcome to attend.  It generally consists of a guest speaker from an overseas church, a shared dinner, lunch, morning and afternoon teas, a book stall with books and resources provided by one of the local Christian book stores, and  generally a great time of fellowship and teaching.

Interesting place to be, for someone battling depression and anxiety, I hear you point out...?  This is true and correct.  And I found a great place to be during the fellowship times:- helping out on the bookstall.  That way I didn't have to deal with too many people at once, I still had great company to hang with, and I could put on my dealing-with-the-people persona to get through it all.  Fantastic!  Maybe...

I made it through the first session, dinner and the time before the next session after that, and didn't go back the next day.  

Darn.

But we did get to our own church for Sunday morning service, and that was cool; had a great chat with a couple of people at the cup-of-tea afterwards.  After that, the weekend was ours to hibernate at will (for me) if the urge so took me.

A week or so before that, I was invited to join a lovely couple of ladies/girls from church at a Woman's One-Day Christian Retreat in a town about an hour or so from Hamilton.  I consider that to be my first big outing for this healing time, and it was really good.  

For those of you who totally get where I'm coming from, it really helps if there are people around who know what the deal is, and places that you can just step out for a bit of a break or time-out and space and peace.


If you've checked out my earlier posts in this series, you may remember that DP and I took a day trip back home a few weeks ago, to see someone for what may have been the last time.  It was.  On Easter Monday, we received the news that he lost his battle with cancer.  It was an emotional time; the person involved was DP's father and my ex-husband.  The memorial service was on the following Saturday, and WookieeMan and I travelled down for it - about a 2 1/2 hour drive one way.  We picked up a young friend along the way, which reminded me of days gone by and added to the overall enjoyment of the day.  The service was very moving, with memories that I had forgotten. It was also great catching up with a few people I haven't seen for quite some time. 

About two weeks, I started volunteering for a few hours a week at the local IHC day programme, that our buddies go to - partly to spend some more time with them, and partly to get some experience under my belt.   I'm a bit excited about one aspect of this:  one of the services users can talk, but more often than not, chooses not to.  So as one of the activities staff there are supposed to be doing with her involves other methods of communication, I have started working one-on-one with her doing sign language.  Another client there is not able to communicate, and he is meant to be learning PECS (Picture Exchange Communication System).  I'm not familiar with that, but I'd like to learn more about it.  Do you know anything about that?  Please comment below if you do. Thanks!!

One thing that's come out of that is the realisation that I'm quite interested in other forms of communication.  A path I could possibly look at exploring - knows what could come out of it?!

Last week I had a JOB INTERVIEW.  It was for a support worker's position in a day programme for elderly people.  We should hear back about it this week.  I'm not overly confident that I got it, but my support person from Workwise said it went really well, although she had never heard so many "can you give us an example of..." questions in an interview before.  Even if I don't get it, I'm happyish with how it went, and I'll keep trying for other roles in my chosen field.  

You would think, wouldn't you, with all of that stuff, I would be a bit of a basket case at times, yes?  Surprisingly, I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be.  I was expecting to crash a bit after the memorial service, but it wasn't that bad either, all things considered.  

My psychologist has suggested mindfulness and meditation. The mindfulness isn't so bad, but I can't quite get my head around the meditation... my thoughts are jumbled together so tightly it's very difficult to separate them, so I think I'll let them come apart on their own a bit, then tackle them. We did discuss a new tactic, though - that of the spotlight.

Spotlight? Huh??  Yeah... not as weird as it may seem.   It works like this...
 
You find yourself in a dark/down/panicky, etc moment; you may not be able to pinpoint exactly what it is, but it's there, alright, the diva on centre-stage.  The thing to remember is, that it's not the ONLY occupant on stage.  So rather than kick the diva out, we need to pull the spotlight back, and widen the circle of light.  What does this do?  it illuminates everyone else also who's on stage.  Now in English, this means that rather than focus on the dark/down/panicky, etc thoughts, we become more aware of our environment and surroundings; the smells, the sights, the sounds, the tastes, and the things we can touch.  Pretty soon, the diva is no longer centre-stage, but becomes a smaller part of the whole picture/surroundings, and becomes easier to deal with as required.

(Now if the theatre is not your thing, dahling, the scenario is adaptable to whatever floats your boat.)


Financially, we were  very blessed a couple of weeks ago - for which we are very grateful, and have managed to pay off a couple of the smaller bills, which has freed up a few dollars.  WM has agreed to take over control of the finances for a little while, which is great - I don't have to worry so much about the home accounting for a bit. Yuss!!

I have noticed one thing, tho:  when I eventually retire, there is NO WAY I will be spending all my free time at home, if I can help it, 'cos I will go NUTS!  Housework has lost its allure - again - but cooking and trying out new stuff is still up there as a fun activity. My sleep patterns are starting to unravel a bit, so that needs addressing ASAP (here comes that technology thing again). I mean, nana-naps -they rock!!  Except if it's later in the day... and it stuffs up your sleepytime that night... which means that you wake up in the morning for the morning caffeine fix, and go back to sleep for a couple of hours... which can stuff up your sleepytime that night... grr...  

Still, onwards and upwards, ay what old bean...?  
-  Enthusiasism for things is returning; 
Dark days are getting lighter, although there is still a dark shadow around the peripheral;
-  My hubby is still fantastical and yummy;
-  Our cats are still numpties;
-  My friends and supporters are still awesome;  
-  Our God is Still AWESOME!! 

So I'd best go and get organised for my day... even though it's half-past noon already!  Stay safe, stay cool and from me to you, 
  
See you next time

Turrah, luv

2 comments:

  1. I love the way you write. And I love you too <3.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Jill, greatly appreciated. Love you too :-)

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